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Getting me down.
Posted by: chas
16/03/08 at 11:39 pm
In 2006 we sold our house in Essex I reluctantly moved with my wife to my Father in laws house in Edinburgh. He is 76 and has to have dialysis three times a week. She cares for him. I assist where possible. I do not work.
During the last year to 18 months my Wife , has behaved numerous times in a irrational manner. And has developed a bulling personality She seems intent on forcing me to retaliate over the silliest of things.
She defames my character to her sister Avril and others. Claiming I don’t do anything about the house. She has a habit of wanting to be the centre of attention. When I have asked if she wanted anything doing she would say no. Then complain to others that I do not help her. I seem always to be in the firing line for complaints. I get treated either I am a five tear old or do not have a brain.
She complains even about the most trivial of things. Such as the latest “taking the wrong apple from a tray“!!!!
She claims that the household expenses for one month sometimes reach £900 This at a house with minimum out going expenses
She is at serious logger heads with her elder sister land accuses me of siding with her.
This is resulting in my health. Both physical and mental being affected.
We do not have any children or joint savings . The sale of our house in Essex monies being divided equally.
I don’t know what to do? But it can’t go on like this
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There is currently 1 reply.
Re: Getting me down.
Posted by: Suzanne Kingston, partner, Dawson's Solicitors
27/03/08 at 6:05 pm
If you think there is a chance that you can save your marriage and this is an avenue you want to pursue, I would suggest you consider marriage guidance and/or counselling.
If you think that your marriage is over then the ground for divorce is the irretrievable breakdown of your marriage. There are five ways this can be evidenced, which are as follows:
a) Adultery
b) Unreasonable behaviour
c) Two years’ desertion
d) Two years’ separation and consent, and
e) Five years’ separation.
From what you have said, you are likely to be able to issue proceedings on the grounds of your wife’s unreasonable behaviour.
The divorce proceedings themselves are relatively straightforward as very few people actually defend a divorce petition. They usually take between 4 – 6 months. A summary of the steps involved is set out below:
1. Once the Petition is finalised, it will be submitted to Court where it will be issued. The party who does this is known as the Petitioner. This usually takes approximately one week, and it will then be served on the other party, known as the Respondent.
2. After the Petition has been served, the Respondent will need to complete a standard form document known as an Acknowledgement of Service. When the Acknowledgement of Service is completed, it will be returned to the Court.
3. Once the Petitioner receives the Acknowledgement of Service, they will be able to complete their Affidavit in support of the petition. They can then make an application for Decree Nisi.
4. Once the application for Decree Nisi is made, the Court will tell us when Decree Nisi is to be pronounced. When the Decree is pronounced we will receive written notification of the Decree.
5. 6 weeks and 1 day after Decree Nisi has been pronounced, you can apply for your Decree Absolute. However, it is usual not to make application for Decree Absolute until the financial issues have been resolved.
Financial matters will also need to be dealt with, and they can be very complicated and depend on your particular situation.
Yours is a complicated situation, and you need to get proper legal advice which is specific to your circumstances. A good place to look for someone suitable would be from the Resolution website which is an organization of family lawyers. There are also many people that you could speak to for counseling, if you think this would be useful, and your local citizens advice bureau, or Relate may be a good starting point.
