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what do i do?

Posted by: mrs B
13/02/07 at 3:51 pm

hi its mrs B again...im so confused 1 day i want to do this the next day i want to do the opposite...is this normal for a wife going through a unexpected split.

i thought if i sell my house and but the small profit if any into my kids account then i could claim on my husbands house?problem is all i would have i half a house that isnt in my name.i havent paid as much as him into it and he wont be very happy if i say i want to sell it and move on...he wants to have a english wife and a thailand lover in thailand....im gutted i wouldnt want my daughter to be used like this if she was married so i know that its not right to live like this...they do in footballer wives..tv shows this is real life...now everyone is as confused as me ..as i keep changing my mind...I THINK REALLY I DO WANT TO GET AWAY AND START MY LIFE AGAIN BUT AT THE MINUTE I HAVE TO LIVE WITH HUBBY AS I HAVE A TENNENT IN MY HOUSE ON A 4WEEK NOTICE...SHES CONFUSED ABOUT WHAT IM DOING..ITS TEARING ME APART KNOWING THAT MY HUBBY WILL HAVE THE HOUSE AND LOVER IN THAILAND AND A NEW PROPERTY HES BUYING IN THAILAND..AND ME IM JUST LEFT TO GO BACK TO MY HOUSE,SO SAD...I FEEL IM HAVING A BREAK DOWN...I WAKE UP SRONG  THEN CRYING THE NEXT.

SO DO I SELL MY PROPERTY AND PUT LITTLE PROFIT IN KIDS ACCOUNT AND THEN SEEK TO CLAIM ON MY HUSBANDS HOUSE WHICH IS IN HIS NAME AND OUR MARRIED HOME.IM REALLY GRATEFUL FOR THE SUPPORT.IM OFF WORK THIS WEEK WITH STRESS..

There are currently 2 replies.

Re: what do i do?

Posted by: Suzanne Kingston, partner, Dawson's Solicitors
14/02/07 at 2:13 pm

In deciding an appropriate financial settlement on divorce, the court’s first priority is the welfare of any children of the family. They will then look at the following factors, in no order of priority:

a) the income, earning capacity, property and other financial resources which each party has, or is likely to have in the foreseeable future, including an increase in earning capacity;
b) the financial needs, obligations and responsibilities which each party has, or is likely to have in the foreseeable future;
c) the standard of living enjoyed by the family before the breakdown of the marriage;
d) the ages of the parties and the length of the marriage;
e) any physical or mental disability of a party to the marriage;
f) the contributions that each party has made, or is likely to make to the welfare of the family, including any contribution by looking after the home or caring for the family;
g) the conduct of the parties, if it would be inequitable to disregard such conduct; and
h) the value to each of the parties to the marriage will lose any benefit which, by reason of the dissolution or annulment of the marriage, that party will lose the benefit of acquiring.

The court will also look at any case law that is relevant to your situation.

Generally speaking, in considering the above factors, the court will take into account all the assets which you and your husband hold, both solely and in joint names. Therefore both the value of your house, and your husband’s house will be taken into consideration. It is extremely unlikely that you will be able to exclude the value of your house from this by selling it and putting the proceeds into your children’s names.

You have said that your husband’s house is in his sole name. Generally speaking, and taking all the factors set out above into account, this should not prevent you from being entitled to some of its value.

However, financial settlements on divorce (known as ancillary relief), is a very complex area, and you should take legal advice from someone who will be able to advise you fully.

Re: what do i do?

Posted by: may
21/02/07 at 4:49 pm

Keep your chin up, only look at one day at a time. If you get through it without a tear give yourself a slap on the back. 

 I know what you are going through and it's a huge hill to climb, but we have to experience the rain and storms to appreciate the sun and blue skies we will soak up at the end. x